One Ringy Dingy, Two Ringy Dingy
“Is this the party to whom I’m speaking?” —-anybody remember Lily Tomlin?
I want Lily Tomlin to answer my phone calls, not some machine.
If you are over the age of 4, please press 1.
If you are in a good mood, please press 2.
If you are in a bad mood, please press 3.
If you are in a really, bad mood—
If you wish to throw your telephone through the window, please press 4 and take a chill pill.
If that doesn’t work, don’t forget about the bottle of Muscadine wine chilling in the fridge.
I hate automated phone answering systems.
On my list for today, I had several calls to make to schedule appointments. By the time I was finished, I wanted to pull my hair out. Why is it so difficult to just speak to someone? Why is it that you can never speak to a real, live person on the phone without having a nervous breakdown first?
I called to make an appointment for Don. I called the number on the form. I got transferred to someone in the adjacent building who transferred me to the receptionist who transferred me to the person who actually schedules those appointments. What???? Did that save anybody any time? Certainly, not me. Every person I spoke with was very polite, but I was not having nice thoughts by the time we were finished.
I needed to schedule routine maintenance on my truck so I tried to do it online but I kept getting thrown to the main page of the dealership instead of to the page to schedule my service. I have a pre-paid maintenance plan and none of the service options were what I needed. All I want is a simple 15,000 mile service. It’s what’s paid for and it’s what I want.
I finally gave up and called the dealership. That started the phone relay…first the main receptionist….then someone else…who finally put me through to the person who schedules the appointments. I wasn’t quite frazzled yet, but I was starting to feel edgy. Is this going to be one of THOSE days?
Next, I called to schedule a personal appointment and after only going through 2 different people, I was actually speaking to the person who would set up my appointment. Didn’t happen. She wanted my insurance information which they already have in their system but since our insurance will change after the first of the new year, I have to wait until after the insurance changes to call them back. Getting closer to being frazzled.
I’ve been tardy about having the gas turned on in The Barn for heating so I called to get that done. What was I thinking? There is no local number for the gas company. You have to call the toll-free number and pray that you get through all the number prompts and pray extra hard that you are directed to the person who is in your local office. After all this, I’ve got an appointment set to do that. I’m wondering why I even need it. The Barn stays about 65 degrees year round for the most part. A simple radiant heater would probably be enough.